In the Air...

Back in May I wrote a blog called "On the Edge"...do you remember?  If not, go back and read it.  Those who know me best know exactly what that story is about.  I like to go back and read my blogs and see what I was going through and compare it to where I am in my life today.  Today's blog is called "In the Air" and there's a reason. 

Back in May I was on the edge and now here I am somehow suspended in the air.  Simply put...I jumped.  Those fragrant flowers on the bottom were too much to simply view them from a distance, I wanted to hold them, to have them in my hands.  Those people at the bottom cheering me on never stopped, even if I could not hear them as loudly. 

I look behind me and there is the edge and all the reasons I jumped. I guess I feel at times that more so I was pushed. The flowers that were planted to convince me to stay have slowly withered and yet still seeds are planted even more so lately to show me how pretty it can be up there.

I haven't landed and although I jumped it's as if time has somehow stopped.  There is still a sense of not wanting to drop and fall to the valley below yet there is a sense of excitement and wonder as to what my next adventure will be in my next chapter.  But the argument that my heart and my mind are having with each other is can I do this?

Everything I know that is crazy yet familiar is up there there on that cliff and then on the bottom is everything I don't know but feel giddy about discovering.  How can I come this far to just say nevermind?  Yes it's scary but I am confident I can face whatever awaits me there...but then when will I get there.

These are things that are floating around in my head as I float in the air waiting for gravity to pull me down and lifelines getting thrown to me in hopes I'll climb back up.  The day I jumped off that cliff was the hardest and most emotional but with each new day since then, and it's only been a few, I'm one step closer to the bottom of the cliff that will  one day become my top of the world.